Posted by Max
T.G.I. Motherfucking F. yâ€™all. If you hate your day job and you know it, clap your hands, then head to the nearest motherfucking bar and get your goddamn GURP on…
Set it off on Friday night with a dose of the rock…and I ainâ€™t talkin’ ’bout suckin’ that glass dick.
You can get your classic pop rock fix from The Kinks’ Ray Davies performing solo at the Warfield in SF; check out East Bay pretty-boy buzz band Audrye Sessions, just off tour and performing a homecoming show at the Uptown Lounge in Oakland; or shave your head down to a mohawk and cause a motherfucking ruckus at Thee Parkside in SF, with Half Moon Bayâ€™s own Nightstick Justice, Desolation and a bunch more punk bands.
Myself, Iâ€™m gonna hit Eliâ€™s Mile High Club in Oakland for Facepilot from Portland, OR, featuring the old school Chico homie Jeff Walker a.k.a. Jeff Rocker on drums. Itâ€™ll be a blunted, beer-soaked, battery-chuckinâ€™ good time.
If you’d rather listen to fresh raps and get down on some wine-and-cheese artsy-fartsy type shit, you can catch the ace homie Z-Man performing at 111 Minna in the City tonight as part of the Juxtaposed-sponsored Suite Jesus art show. Z-Mainey will holding it down with Goodword, Dirtbag Dan and D-Whiz.
Saturday rolls on with no shortage of worthy Gurpology. If youâ€™re a boss, a whiskey fanatic, or just a papered-up alcoholic, weâ€™ll be seeing you at the Whiskeys of the World Expo on the San Francisco Belle yacht down at Pier 3 on the Embarcadero in SF at 6 PM.
After Gurp City sinks the Belle (or drinks it dry — whichever comes first), itâ€™s over to the Mezzanine for Bun B and Devin The Dude, to kick it in a cloud o’ dank, pop collars and hold it down Houston-style for the rest of the night.
If subterranean drunk rap is more your speed, donâ€™t miss Tha Alkaholiks with Hieroâ€™s A-Plus at CafÃ© Du Nord in SF. Itâ€™s a small venue, a great place to see a good show by one of LA’s best-ever rap crews…and if any group is an honorary Gurp City inductee, it’s Tha ‘Liks. Seriously, I was having a hard time between this show and the Bun B / Devin show, and Iâ€™m still trying to figure out a way to hit both…but after Whiskeys of the World…well, thereâ€™s just no calling it.
If you got a mullet and you love to piss and moan about how rock has pretty much sucked since 1989, hit the Warfiled in SF for Y&T (you fag). Better yet, jump in yer Bitchinâ€™ Camaro and haul yer ass up to Tahoe for motherfucking Queensryche at Harrahs, and scream howling staccato like your nuts are in fucking vice.
Rather watch hot chicks bang out hot rock? No problem — SF’s Von Iva are playing at the Uptown Lounge in Oakland, and these ladies always put on a great show.
If youâ€™re in Chico for the weekend, hit Nickâ€™s for The Sleaze Tax, featuring bearded Gurp rock icon The Woot (that’s him on the left, with yours truly in Austin last summer), and indie stalwart Barbara Manning.
Thatâ€™s all for this weekend, Gurpos. If you know of something else going on, hit it up in the comments. Otherwise Iâ€™ll be seeing y’all out on the track…and Iâ€™ll probably be seeing double, too.